Artwork by Dave McKean
With The Meaningful Album Series, I want to share why and how an album made an impact on me in my life. This time, I am going to talk about Machine Heads' greatest album 'Burn My Eyes'.
First encounter:
During the summer of 2001, I went on a school trip to London. On the third day, we walked through the city when I saw a record shop. I went inside and I saw this giant poster with the Burn My Eyes cover. For a moment my breathing stopped. After 'The More Things Change...' I wanted more of that anger, more of that aggression and I did not find that in other bands (looking back, I maybe should have looked a little better). I did some research on the internet and I read that 'Burn My Eyes' was Machine Heads' best work. So I was on the hunt for that album but could not find it in my local record stores. So when saw this poster I was so happy! I found the album right away. I looked at the price tag, I put it back and I walked out. I don't know what the price was but I knew I could not afford it. To be truthful here, I did spend some money at The London Dungeon. And to be completely truthful, I had spent most of my money on the boat to buy food and drinks. But the trip was fun, I got offered a piece of hash by a junkie and got shat on by a pigeon at Trafalgar Square. Good times!
A few weeks later, back home in Alkmaar, I was packing my sleeping gear. I was going to visit my father in Leiden. After everything that happened, I was worried and wanted to know if they were doing ok. When I got there my dad was still his old murky self. My sister was ok, but the way she talked to me and looked at me was very distant. That weekend was uncomfortable, to say the least. So I escaped to the city as soon as I could. On the corner near city hall was this shabby record shop that must have been there for ages. I went inside and it smelled of old damp wood. There were posters everywhere, even on the ceiling. I started to look through the music and when I got to the M there was this cover that instantly caught my eye. I grabbed it, looked at it, paid the money, and ran to my bike. I cycled to my dad's house way too fast, I put the album on, and was overwhelmed by it.
The most vivid memory of this album:
I drew the Machine Head logo everywhere. On tables in class, walls, lockers, in schoolbooks, notebooks, in other people's agendas, on my arm, everywhere. I was so blown away by the record that I stopped going to school by bike. Instead, I walked, which took about 5 minutes longer. In those ten minutes walking to school, I could listen to Davidian and Old which was enough to fire me up for a schoolday. In some classes, I did not take my headphones off until the teacher asked me to. I was a stubborn, true adolescent.
Favourite songs and why:
Davidian:
Of course, I liked Davidian. From the drum fill at the start to the infamous 'Let freedom ring with a shotgun blast' line to the last pounding riff, it was like taking steroids or something.
None But My Own:
Back then I felt hurt, left alone and I was not going to let that get in my way anymore. 'My heart bleeds for none but my own' meant that no one could hurt me anymore except myself. So I kept all the rage inside...
The Rage To Overcome:
...which led me to this song, which sounds like a freight train destroying everything in its path and that was exactly how I felt sometimes.
What it meant to me:
'Burn My Eyes' made me feel more at peace with being a metalhead. I gradually felt more okay being an 'outsider' and I felt proud that I was 'different'. That meant I talked and laughed more and started to make friends. I was getting used to my new environment. On the other hand, I was bottling up a lot of anger and through this record, I started to realize that it has to come out one way or the other. Then I remembered the folding bench and how that helped me to direct and vent my anger. I started to exercise. Every morning I did ten pushups and those abdominal exercises where you lay on the ground and you lift your upper body so you can touch your knees. I used weights to train my arms when I got home from school and that helped a little bit. But the anger was still there. And it fueled my odyssey into metal even more.
Tracklist:
Davidian
Old
A Thousand Lies
None But My Own
The Rage To Overcome
Death Church
A Nation On Fire
Blood For Blood
I'm Your God Now
Real Eyes, Realize, Real Lies
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